Am I being bread crumbed?

Good question, let me ponder but what exactly is breadcrumbing, how am I victim of it?

To begin, let me explain Breadcrumbing, which means leading someone on by contacting them sporadically and without the intention of entering a relationship. 

Typically, it is common phenomena where one wants to hold someone’s attention, remain connected to them, for example, text messages, likes, and comments on social media) to hold their attention and interest. 

They do not want to commit anything but will keep you on tenterhooks, typically it is like showing a carrot to a rabbit.

You are in a space between hope and uncertainty. When they contact you, you feel hopeful but the irregular and uncommitted nature of their contact creates uncertainty about their intentions. 

What happen to your feelings?

• You feel confused about where you stand and unsure of their intentions.
• Your feelings fluctuate between excitement and dejection depending on your interaction with them.

This state cannot continue for long, eventually you would realize the reality of the situation, then either you play along in sheer hope of miracle OR you call out the person and they will conveniently deny.

Why Do People Breadcrumb?

These people are emotionally vulnerable, they thrive on attention, being alone might terrify them but, depending on their personality style, commitment may feel equally frightening to them. Therefore, they give others just enough attention to keep them interested but without ever committing fully. 

Bread crumbing is related to a narcissistic or egocentric personality style. This personality style is characterized by a lack of compassion, a sense of entitlement for the unconditional attention and admiration of others, and an excessive need for control. 

How to deal with it?

Do Not Take It Personally:  You need to stop putting your time and energy into trying to work out their intentions or trying to win them over – it is not about you; it is about them.

Be Honest with Yourself: If a person likes you, they are usually clear about it and do not leave you wondering.

Set and Maintain Boundaries

Call Them Out on Their Behaviour

Walk Away

Bread crumbing, like ghosting and other forms of digital dating violence, is a form of emotional abuse. The victim is treated without respect or consideration for their feelings, which undermines the victim’s self-worth and confidence.